Ciao Mad Libs

(Disclamer: the views expressed in this blog are warpped and twisted and do not accuerately reflect reality as it exists or as others percieve it. by reading this disclamer, you hereby reliquinish all rights to judge the writer -forthwith known as Captain Fantastic- for any and all judgements, observations and commentary contained or written, expressed or implied, with in this blog.)

I _______ (intensity modifier) hate the _______ (intensity modifier) word "Ciao".

"Ciao" can ____ (action verb) a ____ (noun) in ____ (unfriendly place). I hope "Ciao" spends

________ (duration of time) in ____(unfriendly place) while ______ (creatures) ____

(torture verb) its _____(bodily organ), _____ (tortoure verb) red hot _____ ____

(compound word, torture device) up its ___ (bodily orrifice) and ____ (torture verb) out its

________ (bodily organ). I hope "Ciao" gets an incurable _____ ______

(compund word, disease) and has to _______ (verb) from ______ (adjective) contanct for the

rest of its life for fear of ______ (adjective), ______ (adjective), ______ (adjective)

inflammations."Ciao" is a ______ (adjective), ______ (adjective), ______ (adjective) that is

______ (adjective) of its ubiquitous status.

"Ciao" is used all the time. so much so that they might as well not even have other words in the language. You say "ciao" as a greeting, upon departure, in the morning, at night, to people young and old. There is never a time of day when you can't -and for this matter- shouldn't say "Ciao".
One of the frustrating parts of ... of the words that must not be said, from here on, forever and ever, amen... is that you don't ever recieve one "Ciao", 7 are thrown at you, like you were some sort of mob snitch getting gunned down. For Example:

person one - Senti, Rico, ci vediamo domani. [Listen, Rico, we'll see eacother tomorrow.]
person two - Ho-kay, Gianni, a domani. Ciao.
person one - Oh, ciao, grazie. Ciao, ciao.
person two - Ciao, prego. Ciao.
person one - Ciao.

FOR #°*%$ SAKE JUST SAY GOODBYE AND WALK AWAY!!!!!

I have not learned many varients of salutations. there is not the rich myriad of choices that we, the english speaking population, take for granted everyday. There are no Howdy's, Yo's, What's poppin?'s, What's good's or Hey there's.
There is only Boun Giorgno (only to be used before noon), Boun Pomerrigio (only to be used between noon and 4pm), Bouna Sera (5-ish pm to whenever you're done for the night, Salve (straight-up "Hello"), Arrivderci (formal goodbye), and the word that must not be spoken.

in this holiday season i think it is important that we give thanks. I'll go first; I am thankful that "Ciao" has not infected the North American continent. Amen.